As
a family, we have accomplished quite a bit. One of the biggest things we have
done is expand the family by rescuing animals. We currently have three dogs and
a cat, and they are as much a part of the family as me or my parents.
When I was six, we lost the family
dog Alex, and I was heartbroken. So, my dad decided to start taking me to the
humane society. We would go every now and then to walk the dogs. I loved
helping out, and I loved the dogs, so this was clearly a good thing for me to
do. While we were on one of these visits, my dad saw a dog that he thought we
would like.
She was almost a year old, and in
terrible condition. She had been taken away from her previous owner due to his
poor treatment of her. She was thin and needed a lot of attention. She was a
border collie/german shepherd mix and is one of the pretest dogs I’ve ever seen.
While my parents debated whether or not to get her, I knew we had to. I am the
one that caused us to get Sarah, and she is still my dog. Thanks to us, she has
recovered fully and is both healthy and happy.
After a year of having Sarah, my dad
was in Springfield. He was visiting his parents when he decided to check the
pound. My mom wanted a small dog that would be safer with my little sister, so
she was slightly upset that we got Sarah. While Sarah was very careful, she was
much bigger than Katie and would sometimes knock her over. So, my dad went
looking at the pound in Springfield. While he was there he saw a litter of
puppies. He knew that they would be euthanized if no one adopted them, and the
runt of the litter was still there, and it didn’t have a family coming to get
it. So he got her. He brought her home in mid-February as a Valentine’s Day
gift for my mom. My mom named her pepper because of her spots. She has grown up
a healthy and happy dog, and I’m glad we saved her.
The dog we saved most recently came
a few years after we got pepper. One day, we just found him in our yard. We
didn’t know how he got there, but we knew we had to find his owners. While we
waited for his owners to come, we took good care of him. Maybe too good of
care. On many different occasions he would turn up in our yard. Eventually his
family said they couldn’t keep him. Before they took him to the shelter they
offered him to us, and we gladly accepted. We finally figured out how he was
getting in and out of our yard after he kept running away from us. He would dig
under our fence slightly, and squeeze through, because he is fairly small.
Thankfully, we recognized this and have prevented him from escaping in the
future.
All in all, my family has done quite
a bit for our pets. Although they all had very different backgrounds, they all
needed help. We were glad to help them, and we now have a very happy family.
I really like dogs, and I really like the point of this essay. I like that you gave examples and I love the amount of detail you put into your examples. That said, there are quite a few wording errors that make parts of your essay more difficult to read. They're mostly word-order issues that distract the reader and are kind of confusing. I would just reread your essay and see if you can find any of them, then have someone else read it and see if they notice any areas that need improvement. Good job, though, I really liked it!
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